My Life in Letters: W.

Writing.

It’s the other half of my degree, it’s the thing that kick-started any creativity I’ve ever possessed.

I first starting writing when I was 9 years old. One Saturday morning I was bored while my mum had a lie in. Back then, the internet wasn’t really something a nine year old was interested it, so the computer for me consisted of Paint. And that’s about it.
However, on this particular morning the Word Processor attracted my attention for some reason. 
So I decided there and then that I would write a story. Being a huge Buffy the Vampire Slayer fan even at that age, my first paragraph was essentially regurgitated Whedon script, and as a nine year old thinking it was totally cool and not knowing the word ‘plaigarism’ then. 😉
So, what started as a bored nine year old wanting to pass a few hours, turned into my first novel. Which then spawned a sequel and eventually transformed into a trilogy, which I completed when I was 13. 
These early novels were terribly written, but the plot showed potential. I am currently trying to dig through it to find some gems for the basis of an adult rewrite.

From the second I started writing that first book, I decided (and told anyone who’d listen) that I wanted to be an author when I grew up. 
I continued writing through my teen years, starting a handful of projects that I never saw through to completion, but at least continuing to stretch my writing brain.
When I found the course at Bolton University, I decided it was ideal for me. At that point writing had taken a back seat to photography in terms of a career path, but was still a passion of mine and one I wanted to pursue. The course offered me the chance to study both photography and writing together, which was perfect for me.

Since coming to university I’ve steered more into poetry, as the fiction tutor wasn’t inspiring me to try my best, while my poetry tutor was. Strangely, before coming here I hated poetry. I hated how it was taught, I didn’t like the typical overly dramatised representations of it I’d been exposed to and the archaic language I’d experienced with poets such as Shakespeare- which let’s face it, is all you’re ever really taught in high school. 
Since learning it in university however I’ve fallen in love with it. I’ve built myself a good body of work, and I may even pursue getting it published.

In the meantime my fiction has been put on a back burner, but it’s all still there, and I have several ideas to work on in the future. 

Although my career path has changed course a little, I still want to pursue writing, and I still want to eventually get those books published that I so long ago sat down and started writing, thinking to myself “wow this is awesome, I can do anything I want here!”

Eventually, I want to make that girl’s hopeful dream of “when I grow up I want to be an author” a reality. Until then, poetry me up baby. 🙂

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Motivation.

Normally by this point in the year I’m still completely immersed in projects, New Year’s Resolutions and completely overcome with drive and motivation.

This year, for some reason this just isn’t the case. 

I’ve been really struggling to find any motivation to get done the things I know I must. This is my final ever semester at University before I graduate, and the work load is disappointingly light in comparison to last semester.
At the end of last year I put on my first exhibition of my work for that semester- that was a huge module. It consumed my every waking moment. In comparison, the work load for my final term is just not enough to keep me motivated.

I’m someone who loves to be busy, to be out and about all of the time. And yet, within the last few weeks mostly I’ve been watching TV, putting off tasks that would take minimal time and effort and playing video games in my pyjamas. 
I’m sure that the reason for this lack of motivation is down to the workload- for some reason the lack of has induced a sense of non-urgency in me. Last semester I hardly had a free moment to myself. This time around I’m procrastinating the days away without so much as looking at my assignments.
I’m up to date (for the most part) on my workload- it’s not building up or anything. But maybe that’s the problem- I’m doing nothing with my time and yet I’m on top of my work. That to me seems a little wrong and weird. The fact that these are the modules that will determine my graduating grade seems just off to me. 

The good thing about having free time though, is that I’ve starting shooting for myself again. I did my first self portrait in months yesterday and uploaded it, which was good! ( http://www.flickr.com/photos/bryonyharwood/12617987223/ ) 

This is my super excited to be shooting again face from yesterday. 🙂

I think the fact that I am graduating soon is becoming a little difficult to swallow. For the last three years of my life I’ve had my own home, my own time, my own money and my own work to do.

After graduation we will be having to move back in with parents before we can afford our own place. That is something that deeply depresses me. As much as I enjoy the company of those I will be living with, I’m used to my own space and my own way of handling a household now. I don’t want to be in someone else’s home. I want to be in my own.

That is a motivation thought in a way- I want to get a job ASAP and save up enough to move out. But until then, I have to do assignments that feel well below my intellectual level and continue to have not enough of it to keep my time occupied.

Has anyone else gone through something like this? Total lack of inspiration and motivation? Any tips on how to overcome it? 
Anyone who also has been to university- did this happen to you when you were on the brink of finishing? Or was your motivation stronger than ever? Let me know, I’d like to hear from you.

New glasses, though. 🙂

 

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Review: Lush’s Sex Bomb Bath Ballistic

I wanted to do something a little different today. So I’ve decided to do this!

There’s pretty much nothing better, on a rainy day when you’re generally feeling rubbish, than a hot bath. Even better if you have some Lush bath bombs to put in it.
I absolutely love the brand Lush, as for one thing everything in their store is completely cruelty free and vegan, which is really awesome. I find that it is really hard to find completely cruelty free products these days, as frankly, most places that claim to be, actually get other companies to test their ingredients on animals instead. Which sucks.

One product line, among the many, that I love from Lush, is of course their bath bombs. They are incredible. All of them have natural ingredients and always smell incredible. They usually have some kind of secret little surprise inside when you put them in the bath and fizz away also!

Today, I chose to use my Sex Bomb Ballistic, which is one I’ve not tried before now. I think it’s so pretty with the little rose and the colours are incredible (mine unfortunately faded slightly since I bought it since I kept it in the windowsill. oops).
It’s made from jasmine, clary sage and ylang ylang, and it smells incredible. The jasmine is the primary smell in my opinion, but it also has a hint of powdery lilac flower to my nose.

When put into the water, as expected, it fizzes into a bright pink, which is, almost impossibly, both a hot pink and a pastel all at once? I think the pastel comes from the purple elements of the bomb.
The smell was absolutely beautiful, and really powerful! I left the bathroom door open while I was running the water and the smell of jasmine filled the whole of the upstairs of my house!

I’ve got to say, it was one of the most relaxing baths ever. I absolutely love the smell of jasmine, and it’s such a calming scent that I was just blissed out the whole time.
Apparently the bomb is also filled with soya milk, which leaves your skin feeling ridiculously soft! (No complaints here.)
I got out of the bath about five hours ago now and the scent is still on my skin.
Happy customer!

The Sex Bomb bath ballistic is a permanent product in Lush (as far as I’m aware) and costs £3.20. Thoroughly worth it. 🙂

* Please note that all of the photography in this post is my own. Do not alter, re-post or in any other way reproduce these images without my prior permission.
** Disclaimer: This is not a sponsored post. I just wanted to write about something a little different for once. 🙂

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Dear Readers (Part 2)

Okay, so I got a lot of likes on my last post, but only one person commented. 😛
GUIIIIISE.
Right, plan B. I am going to write the questions here in a blog post, and if you wish to be SUPER HELPFUL and make me super grateful then please PLEASE send me a tweet at https://twitter.com/CameraMemories and let me know if you’d be willing to answer them. I will then DM you my email address and you can send me your answers, along with your name and username on WordPress. Thank you, kids! (At the end of the post there’s a zoomed in version of my cats nose. YOU’RE EVEN MORE WELCOME!)

What sort of blogs do you like to read on WordPress? Why?
Why did you choose WordPress over all other blogging platforms?
What are the main benefits of using WordPress for a writer?
What effect has WordPress had on your exposure as a writer?
How many hits on average do you get per post?
Have you ever gained any career opportunities as a result of publishing with WordPress?
Would you recommend WordPress to other writers over other platforms?
As a writer, what are the negative aspects of using WordPress?
What are your concerns about plagiarism while publishing with WordPress?
How do you protect yourself against plagiarism?

PLEASE HELP MEH!! I don’t want to fail. 😦
(Plus my tutor is mean. I NEED VOLUNTEERS GUISEEE! <3)

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Dear Readers,

I call upon my followers and readers to please help me with a research project I am doing for university about whether or not WordPress is a good platform for aspiring writers!

It would be massively helpful if you could leave comments saying what you like about WordPress, what you are here to read about, whether you feel it is beneficial to you as a writer, and if there are any notable bloggers you feel I should take a look at for this project!

As a thank you, here is a picture of my cat’s nose. (I laughed at this for a good hour. You’re welcome.)

THANKS!! ❤

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2013: The Best Yet…?

It may be a little early in the year to start having musings like this, but… I get the feeling 2013 may well end up being my best year yet.
I’m a person who absolutely LOVES having a full diary. I love being busy and I have so much lined up this year that I feel it will be very rewarding.

My personal portfolio  of work is growing rapidly with help from my 52 Week Project on Flickr, I have my first ever wedding shoot coming up (which is also my first commission! EEE!!!!!!) in the summer, and a few shoots with aspiring models too!
I’m hoping to donate a few posters to the Every Day Sexism Project campaign in exchange for some publicity, which will be amazing for getting my name out there; plus helping out a cause I am so passionate about will be so rewarding in itself.
I am determined this year to GET SHIT DONE.
“Ohhh I want to read more, but I don’t have the time”. NO. You DO have the time. But you spend it on Tumblr looking at photos of cats when you could be lost in Middle Earth. STOP IT AND PICK UP A BOOK.
“Ohhh that novel I wrote when I was young- I want it to be published but it has to be rewritten first.” SHUT UP. Just bloody WRITE the damn thing then! Sit down and just WRITE for hours like you used to do when you were young. Get lost in the story. SEND IT OFF.
“Ohhh I’m not as skinny as I’d like to be.” YOU ARE A STUDENT. That means you have free access to the swimming pool in designated time slots. FUCKING GO AND SWIM OFF SOME CALORIES. It’s not even that far to walk to get there! (Do NOT get a taxi.)

Quite besides all my personal projects of the year so far (and it’s only March; JESUS!), I also have so many exciting plans lined up for the summer!
Dom’s 21st birthday is next weekend, and we’re going to Laser Quest. I’ve never been before but I’m really excited! Basically paintballing without the pain! ME LIKES!

Plus, as a birthday present to him, his mum and dad are sending the two of us to Venice in the summer (?!?!?!?!?!) !!!! Which I am BEYOND stoked for! I’ve never been to any part of Italy before, and Dom’s always wanted to go to Venice. It’ll have some incredible photo opportunities for me, and it will be amazing to see it before it sinks. Plus, I’ve not been out of this country for about ten years now. I need to go somewhere with SUN, dammit!

This year is also my 21st, and for that we’re going to go and see Cirque du Soleil in London! I am SO EXCITED!! I’ve wanted to see them perform ever since I was a little girl and I FINALLY get the chance to!

In April it’s my best friend Grant’s 21st; for that him and I are going to see Derren Brown for the second time. It’s an all new show that’s not even been announced yet. I love Derren Brown so much and I’m so looking forward to seeing him perform again! I might even get to meet him a second time!

As if all of this wasn’t enough, we’re also heading to Download Festival in June! Which means I will finally get to see Slipknot live!!!! Not to mention Motorhead, Iron Maiden, Rammstein, 30 Seconds to Mars and Bullet for my Valentine!!!! AHHH! I’m so stoked I might be sick!!

This year looks as if it might well be the best yet! Now just to get through these fucking assignments and the fun can begin! 😀

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University is hard.

It’s come to my attention that I have now not written a blog for well over a month. Whoops.

The main reason for this is the amount of work I’ve had on with my degree. I’m studying a joint honours BA in Photography and Creative Writing. This semester, I’ve had two photography modules and one poetry module.
For one of my photography modules I was expected to create an entire book of 18 individual concepts within a time frame of approximately nine weeks. Pretty tall order, as I had another two modules to find time for too.
However, I’ve done it! I’ve sent my book to be bound now, and I’ve finished shooting for my other module too! So now, I can finally focus on my journal works and essays. Those, for me, are easier to do as they are less time consuming.
I sent my book to be bound last night, and I breathed a massive sigh of relief. However, it won’t be delivered until the 18th… which kind of sucks as I need to hand it in before then. I’m hoping I won’t be down-marked for that though; my tutor said that as long as we all have receipts to show we ordered it before the deadline then it is fine.
The theme I chose was to transform each poem I have written into a photo. It actually worked out pretty well to be honest. My photos translated really well.

I have about two weeks left of this semester now before we break up for Christmas; that means two weeks of trying to find the money to pay for presents and travel and all sorts of things- that’s another thing that makes university a pain in the ass; the amount you have to spend! I’m paying almost 4,000 a year for my degree, another 50 a week in rent, plus bills etc… all without a job or any kind of government help. Plus as a photography student I have a lot of supplies needing to be bought- the book alone cost me 30 and my other final piece will cost another 20 minimum. Then there’s 40 each time my printer runs out of ink- which is does very often as I have to print out every single thing I shoot… Sigh.
Next semester I will be working though. I wanted to work two jobs but my boyfriend has more of less forbidden me to do that as he thinks I will run myself into the ground with the stress of it. To be honest he may be right- a joint honour degree means I have twice the work load most have anyway, and I get the least financial help.

Next semester should be easier- the work load won’t be as intense, and having a job will help with financial problems.
2012 has been a really hard year for various reasons; it’s also been an awesome year, thanks to spending it with Dom.

Here’s hoping 2013 has some cool shit to offer me too. 😉

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Snow White and the Huntsman: Review

Warning: I will be talking about the plot in this review, so if you don’t care for spoilers, don’t read until after you’ve seen it. If you’ve already seen it, or if you simply don’t care for the film, go ahead and read.

Before even seeing the film, I’ll admit, I was skeptical. Why? Because Kristen Stewart stars as the main role. And as far as I’m concerned, any film with her in at all, never mind being the starring role, is never the set up for a good film. However, the trailer convinced me that perhaps the story behind it, and the supporting actors could turn it around and make it a worth while watch.
After having watched the film, I came to one very firm conclusion: This is a badly written film, disguised with good graphics and effects to make it appear to be a good film.
The film itself, looked very good. Visually, it was wonderful. Everything else? Fell flat. Very flat.

The beginning was good- I enjoyed the first 20 or so minutes thoroughly, and I dared to hope that this film would prove my skepticism wrong. The film looked good, thus far the acting was good, and even Kristen Stewart’s slightly off British accent hadn’t completely ruined the entire thing. So far, so good. Dark, sadistic, disturbing, and just mild enough to keep its 12A rating.
However, it wasn’t long before Stewart began to regain the classic qualities that make my regard for her “acting” stoop to between poor and horrific. No change in facial expression, too much “breathy” talking, one tone of voice, regardless of situation, and strange, stiff movements. That and painfully unconvincing attempts at portraying different emotions (probably due to the one tone of voice and no change in facial expressions).

Besides the flawed acting abilities of the “fairest of them all” (just me, or did the Queen really have nothing to worry about in comparison?), the writing of this film is what really let it down. There were some really interesting ideas in the film, that brought new life into the well known tale, but they were simply brushed over, and never looked at again, leaving the potential hanging in the air untouched. Instead, the writing seemed more focused on showing random, out of sequence events all surrounding the protagonist, and ultimately leading to a very anti climatic ending.

The star of the show was undoubtedly the Queen, played by Charlzie Theron. She was dark, threatening, beautiful- everything the character required, and more. Plus her performance outshone every other actor effortlessly. I’ve gotta say, Charlzie does “evil” very well.

There were several things I particularly had a problem with in the film- I’ll run through them one by one.

1) This is in regard to the costumes. For the most part, they were good. They suited the characters and they worked in the grand scheme of things. There was one thing that totally baffled me though- Snow White enters the film wearing a long tradition but dirty dress. In the forest, it becomes obvious that underneath this very traditional dress, she also happens to be wearing… trousers? Tight black trousers? I mean, am I nit-picking here, or did this really confuse anyone else too?

2) The strange love triangle they seemed to be trying to include (because apparently Stewart won’t be in a film now unless there’s a really weird, inexplicable three way relationship with her in the middle of it all), between The Huntsman (that’s another thing- he’s never given a name. He’s just “The Huntsman”. Seriously. He’s even credited as such at the end.) Snow White, and some kid she used to know called William, the son of the Duke (another character not worthy of a name other than his title). Not only is this triangle really, really weird (The Huntsman has to be at least 20 years older than her in this, right? And as for William? Well… they haven’t seen one another in 10 years in the film… and yet when they meet again they’re inexplicably in love?), but it simply doesn’t go anywhere. It’s utterly bizarre. The writers touched on this concept, and then decided just to leave it there. They didn’t conclude it, they never explained it, and they never developed any of the characters far enough to even make the audience care enough to want to find out. (This means, by the way, please please PLEASE don’t attempt a sequel…)

3) This one is a carry on from my last point; the character development. Or lack of. Seriously, there is none, whatsoever. No character in the entire story stays for long enough to have any kind of identity. And the ones who do stay around are so incredibly one dimensional they belong in a 90’s video game. And for some reason, the writers decided to try to big up some of the characters that served little to no purpose to the entire film by concluding it with them all alive and well. As if the audience ever knew enough about them in the first place to care. Le sigh.

4) And finally, it was far too long. The film was 2 hours, 7 minutes long. And nothing happened in it. The beginning was good, then there was 2 hours of useless filler and no direction at all, and then there was a really rushed final 20 minutes to conclude the entire thing? What? Come on, director, come on.

Overall, I was disappointed by the film. It had great potential, some fresh ideas, and one good performance, which unfortunately, wasn’t enough to save it. I’m amazed that they managed to ruin such a good idea, with such promising concepts, but it all just fell flat. Bad writing, bad acting and bad direction.
4/10.

Oh, and Kristen Stewart? Just change careers please. Now. This clearly isn’t your calling, is it?

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